background art, public domain,enhancements ChaliceMedia

We’re getting tired of these damned liberal tirades about how we treat our women. What? Do these lefty-leaning busybodies think they can undermine our overwhelming strength (and capital contributions) by playing off a bunch of feel-good shit about our wives, daughters, and mistresses? Let’s take it a point at a time shall we?

1. Equal pay for equal work. Bah! This is not how our Maker* intended it to be. If they were capable of doing equal work, which they’re not, but IF they were…it would put the REAL breadwinners, the MEN in a position of belittlement. You get a woman too interested in doing deals, cutting jobs, and crafting crooked contracts and the next thing you know — she forgets how to make those oatmeal raising cookies that you like. What’s next? Wanting to stop at six kids?

2. An equal say. Hah! The damn liberals in Wyoming surely started it all — what d’ya mean liberals in Wyoming?  Well, my fellow Americans, Wyoming was the FIRST STATE to allow women to have the vote. Their danged women already had it as a Territory and they wouldn’t join up with the Union unless they could keep it. Colorado, was second, and the FIRST state where MEN actually voted to give women the right to vote. Now, c’mon, before you go off half cocked. There are plenty of things women should have a say it. What brands of diapers, milk, and other feminine things to buy, but By God, leave the important things, like Cars, Banking, and Football… to MEN.

3. Access to sharp objects. We firmly believe (after the Bobbitt case) that the only sharp objects women should be able to touch are sewing needles and diaper pins.

You feel better about it now that I’ve cleared it all up for you?

Em Gideon

*This is guy who runs THE FUND.

Tweet, What a Silly Word

Our MTLTA SuperPAC¹ has told us that we can have an unlimited amount of money (well up to three billion anyway — cheapskates) for our campaign, so I could have hired an IT guy to do this stuff for me. I figured, however, that if I’m going to communicate strongly enough with the younger generation to get out and really win this thing, I’d better learn how to do it myself.

Tell me what you think of this:

IM gng 2 wn ths mf nov elctn!

Later,
Em

¹ See the MTLTA page for more information on this SuperPAC.

Em Gideon, Running for Office --- Again

Em Gideon here.

I’m excited to announce the birth of a new political party, one that’s going to kick ass in every election in the country next year. I’m glad we don’t have any liberals around anymore, but this split among conservatives has gotten really interesting.

Why?

• We’re going to charge ahead because nothing is being done in Washington. We don’t want anything to get done either, but…
• We’re tired of the same old crap from people who are not getting things done on the WRONG projects.
• We’re tired of the same old crap from people who are not getting things done on the WRONG legislation.
• We’re tired of the same old crap about people getting paid more for things not getting done than we are.

How are we going to do it?

• We know where all the bodies are buried.
• We have compromising information on half the lobbyists in Washington D.C.
• We have compromising information on MORE than half of the country’s bankers.
• We’re tired of congress having put up with just being millionaires and having to kiss the shiny butts of the billionaires in New York and Gonads, Oklahoma.

Time for YOU to climb aboard this train. We’re gonna win and we’re gonna win HUGE!

Y’all like the logo? I stole it from some website where they were using it to make fun of me and my people. Calling US nutcases for crap’s sake. It’s cheaper than paying twenty bucks to our own graphics designer, and since it’s just got initials we can make it say anything we want.

AWNP. American West National Party, that’s US. AWNP.US, you can’t get anymore US than that!

Vote early, vote often, and vote AWNP!

Em Gideon
Your Next President (or Senator, or Congressman, or something)

 *PS. I left this dang article called “Hello World” for a while because we don’t have any IT guys yet — but I recently paid a guy a couple hundred bucks from our MTLTA SuperPAC and he fixed it.